Good news, I have an appointment next week with a counselor. I have never in my life seeked professional counseling before. I'm actually looking forward to it though. It will be nice to have someone to talk to that is removed from friends and family. They don't have license to prescribe medication but as mentioned before, I'm OK with that. Maybe I just need to cry my eyes out and spill all things on my heart and in head and that will be enough. We shall see.
Here are some motivation quotes I grabbed from Pinterest. I really liked them all and it does help to read them.