"T"- Todd

What?! It's not 10pm yet and I'm posting !! I tell ya, blogging on Saturdays is not easy for me. This is the 2nd weekend since I moved , so I feel like I have to work from dusk to dawn to get the place in order. We spent the entire morning and afternoon unpacking the garage.  I know , you'd think we would focus on the inside of the house BUT... I needed to know where some things were in the garage. To add to my all time craziness, i have my junk show that I signed up for next weekend.  I had my first show last November, and she let us sign up for the spring show at the time.  Of course, I had no idea I would be buying a house 6 months later when I signed up.  I'm really not ready but at same time, I really need to sell a lot of stuff to get out of my garage. 

I wanted to mention my sweet husband Todd.  In August, we will celebrate our 3rd year wedding anniversary. We dated 2 years before we married so almost 5 years that we've been together. 

Todd is 6 months older than me and I live that we're the same age.  He also loves music as much as I do. We attend many concerts and love listening to live bands.  Todd is also a drummer for our church worship band.  We often mention how lucky we are that we both love music and have quite a bit of knowledge between the two of us about bands , songs, etc.  

Todd loves to ride his Harley.  Fun fact, I helped him study for his motorcycle license test 12 years ago.  I had my license years before him and when we first met, he called them Murdercycles and had no interest in bikes.  He's come full circle now!! 

Todd was / is my best friend.  We met 21 years ago and became instant friends. In between those years he had moved to Houston. We never lost touch and always kept up our friendship. It was absolutely 100% platonic.  I literally did not see him as anymore than a friend. He was also married and I knew his wife and we would all hang out together sometimes. Fast forward to 2011, i had ended an 8 yr relationship with my Ex and Todd has recently divorced.  We were checking on each other just for moral support and to make sure each other were OK.   One night we stepped out for dinner, and he said to me " you realize this is the first time ever we are both single at the same time".  I just nodded and stared.  Todd then said , " I think we have to least give it a shot to see if there is chemistry between us.  Let's face it, we know everything about each other - good , bad and ugly".  I was so scared of the possibility that it could ruin our friendship, I got angry that he would even consider us dating.   Later on that week, I was talking to mom over the phone and I remember telling her " you're not going to believe what Todd did! He went THERE and made our friendship awkward. It was like Harry met Sally". Then Mom told me that she couldn't explain it but that she had good feeling about us. She felt like she knew Todd from all the years of our friendship. He used to always call me when I visited her in Montana.  She said " y'all are grown adults, if it doesn't feel right after the first date or so, stop before it jeopardizes your friendship. 

Like they say, the rest is history! Todd has been my rock this past year and more. When I "broke" and became very anxious and depressed , he's been so great.  When I started counseling, he was supportive. When i lost Daddy a few months ago, he was right by my side.  I haven't been easy to live with lately with my anxiety off the hook from the move.  He hugs me and tells me it will all work out.  

I love him so much and I'm so lucky that he loves me.  I still wonder why GOD has me wait until I was 45 to ever marry for the first time , then I just remind myself that HE was preparing both myself and Todd for each other in marriage.  

A Love Song - First love Last Love

 There are songs that just grab me and sink into my soul like no others.  As so many of my blogger friends agree, music is a huge part of our lives and can transport us to the very minute of a memory. Maybe that memory is when we first heard that song or that the song was playing during a momentous event.  A movie titled About Last Night was released in 1986. That was the year of my high school graduation and when I started my first year of junior college. When you graduate, you literally feel the pressure of being a "grown up" and leaving your parents house. You're making decisions that will literally steer your course of action and impact your entire career path.  For some girls in my class, their main goals was to get married and get started on a family right away like their mom did and their grandmother.  I didnt have a high school love. I went to small high school and my whole graduating class was only 98 students.  Most everyone grew up together and started going school together since Pre K.  I was an outsider and transferred there my freshman year.  Basically, we were one big family that knew everything about one another.  There were only a handful of couples that got together and stayed that way.  The girls had to go outside our school and went to the nearby small towns to flirt with those boys. 
I had a dance scholarship to a junior college here in texas. It was in East Texas and it was college drillteam.  The football team, drillteam and cheerleaders all had to be at the college and dorms before everyone else because there of the football games starting the first week of school and we had to be prepared.  I met a boy named Scot.  He was a linebacker on the football team and was a year older than me.  That meant that the sophomore girls on my dance team all knew him and they warned me to stay away.  I did not heed that warning and i had met my first true love.   We dated my whole freshman year and most of my sophomore year.  I loved him with all my heart and i know he loved me. It was young love though and we had different plans for our futures that took us in different directions. Long distance love is hard and especially hard on young college kids. 
Back to the song, Bob Seger had always been one of my favorites since i was a young girl. My mom loved him too and had all his albums.  When this movie came out and this song was on the soundtrack, i bought it that week.  It sang of a love i wanted. It was a love that i always dreamed of . I hoped that a man in my life would feel this way for me.
The movie was on last night and i bet it had been at least 10 years since i saw it.  When this song came on and the love scenes were playing i focused on the words again and tears streamed down my face.  It was an amazing feeling that 29 years later since i first heard this song, i found that love.  It took me a while and many heartbreaks along the way with wrong relationships.  I have a husband that loves me for all my good , bad and ugly.  Todd proclaimed his love for me and never wanted to let me go.  I live in his heart and he lives in mine.  We have only been married a few months shy of 2 years so we most likely wont celebrate a 50 year anniversary (we're in our late 40's) but i cherish every minute i can.  And i can say now that it was worth the wait.
Living inside my heart -Bob Seger